Becoming Her Again

A journey back to identity, wholeness, and biblical womanhood.

Hey Sis… let’s talk about coming home to yourself.

I know it’s been a while since I made a post to truly connect with you. Yes, I’ve been sharing my Sunday Stories on Substack, but there’s a deeper part of my heart… the homemaking, the faith, the womanhood, the lived-in conversations, that I haven’t shown up for in the way I’ve wanted to. And as we move toward a new year, God has been stirring my heart on a few things. Things about identity, balance, home, rest, partnership, and what it really means to live a life that feels honest and whole. Things I’m finally ready to talk about.

Because somewhere in this season, I realized I’m not the only woman trying to find her way back to herself.

I create because I believe homemaking God’s way is not dead. It’s not outdated, and it doesn’t belong only to women with white couches, perfect lighting, and color-coordinated storage bins. Real homemaking, the kind that honors God, is lived in the quiet spaces we don’t always show online. It’s when you plan your entire day out and nothing goes as planned. The budget is already tight, and somehow you still have to stretch what you have for another week until payday. And after a while, you just give up on trying to create this perfect “atmosphere” because you are bone-tired and just trying to make it through the day.

And Sis… if I am exhausted, I know you are exhausted.
And not in a cute way. Not in a “just need some coffee” way.
But in a “I’m isolating, I’m in my room, I’m shutting down, I’m mentally unavailable” kind of way. The kind of exhaustion that makes you check out without even realizing it.

I’m not coming to you as someone who has this all figured out. I’m coming as a woman who struggles too. I cry. I fuss. I yell sometimes. I wear my heart on my sleeve, and my family can tell exactly how I feel the moment I walk into the room. I get overwhelmed. I get frustrated. I get it wrong, apologize, fix it, try again… and repeat the process the next week.

I am talking to you from experience — a woman who has lived, learned, is still living, and still learning.

And the truth of what I’m learning in this season is this: homemaking is heart work. It is ministry. And ministry is rarely neat. It’s rarely simple. And people who pretend they get it right all the time aren’t teaching anybody anything.

As I step deeper into my 40s, I’ve been reflecting on how much of myself I laid down in the name of being a “good” wife and mother. In my 30s, I thought being exhausted meant I was doing motherhood correctly. I thought putting myself last was “holy.” I thought denying my needs made me more spiritual.

None of that pleased God.
That wasn’t humility — it was legalism.
And God does not subscribe to legalism.

But here’s the part we don’t talk about enough:
If God doesn’t call us to break ourselves, then what does He call us to?

He calls us to be women who walk in His strength — not our own.
Women who cultivate peace because they have peace.
Women who build homes with intention because their hearts are anchored in Him.
Women who understand that you cannot pour out of emptiness.
Women who know that rest isn’t rebellion — it’s obedience.

Because if we are not becoming the women God is shaping us to be, then we cannot produce the homes we pray for. We cannot create what we do not already have. And we cannot expect peace to flow through our home when we are constantly functioning from depletion.

When a woman is overwhelmed or unheard, she still needs rest. She still needs care. She still needs community.

Sometimes that support won’t come from inside her home — and in those cases, she needs trustworthy women around her. Women who can help her carry the weight without overstepping, who can encourage her, pray with her, give her room to breathe, and help her reset.

There are ways to lighten your load without creating conflict. There are ways to care for yourself while honoring your home. And I’m going to talk about these things more in an upcoming series, because so many women, and husbands, were never shown what healthy partnership looks like. Many of us don’t know how to express our needs or communicate in a way that brings peace instead of tension.

Let me also say this with honesty:
I learned the hard way what happens when you put your husband where only God belongs. It wasn’t dramatic, but it was a slow unraveling, losing pieces of myself because I elevated my marriage above my Maker. And God had to gently remind me that my husband is a gift, but not my source. A partner, but not my foundation. A man I love deeply, but not the One who defines me. God never intended for marriage, even a good one, to sit in His seat.

Homemaking doesn’t matter because of how it looks. It matters because of the heart and intention behind it. What we create within our homes shapes the atmosphere our families walk into every day.

But homemaking is not an aesthetic. It’s getting up early sometimes, and praying your way through the day when your strength is gone. It’s doing the small things with a surrendered heart. It’s asking God to help you see Him in the ordinary moments when nobody sees what you’re carrying.

This next chapter of my life is about learning how to take care of myself while still caring for the people I love. My spiritual health matters. My emotional health matters. My physical health matters. And I want to know myself again, not just as wife and mother, but as Takisha.

I do have a word for the year of 2026, but I’m holding it close for now. I will soon reveal that word to you and go into detail about why I chose it and how it is shaping this entire season.

If any of this speaks to you, then you are in the right place.
We’re going to walk this season out together. Slowly. Intentionally. Prayerfully. One imperfect day at a time.

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Here are some Bible passages for reflection

• Luke 10:38–42 — Mary & Martha and the blessing of rest
• 1 Kings 19:1–8 — Elijah’s burnout and God’s care
• Galatians 6:2 — Carrying one another’s burdens
• Ecclesiastes 4:9–10 — Partnership and helping one another up
• Proverbs 14:1 — A wise woman builds her home